Sometimes it feels like I will never know how to sing.
I’m having an unusually difficult singing day today, and for no apparent reason. But maybe it’s a good day to try to write it out, to see if I can get to the heart of things...
This rep shift... whooboy!! There is nothing worse for a singer’s development than for someone to tell you “Wow, your voice is really getting big!” or “You voice is so much richer than it used to be!” The power of suggestion is very strong, and no matter how present you are in your singing, it is way too easy to start singing bigger and darker and richer the more people tell you that they hear those things. Make sense?
So I’ve added new arias - and new roles - this year, and I’ve been finding myself getting repeatedly tied up in knots. I can sing my new pieces just fine, but then when I pull out a Debussy song for the December recital or an older “lighter” aria, I find that I have zero nuance. No control, no float. Like my voice is a Mac truck. Not. Fun. And more than not fun, very frustrating and discouraging! Things I am not used to feeling when I sing...
Singing has always been easy for me. Maybe not cool to say that, but it’s true. I’ve had good teachers who haven’t gotten in the way of my voice’s natural development, and my reliance on text and acting has always lead me right. But now I’m getting in my way... I’m trying to sing with a voice that is not (yet) my own.
Yes, my voice IS bigger and warmer and all those things people are hearing, but it is still my bright, clear, pliant instrument. That hasn’t gone away. It’s not as if I woke up one morning a year ago and had an entirely new instrument! It’s just growing up, maturing. (Add “fine wine” metaphor here...) If I let go of my easy high notes or flexible tone in sacrifice to this bigger, warmer voice, I will lose. Lose facets of my voice, lose years of longevity, lose confidence. This is not a sacrifice I am willing to make.
So... how do I proceed?
I get back to regular voice lessons. I haven’t had one in about a year and a half, and self-diagnosing is always a bad idea, whether it’s looking up “abdominal pain” on the internet at 2am or trying to move into a new Fach. I’m going to take some lessons with a soprano; all of my post-undergrad teachers have been men or mezzos, two summers with Phyllis Curtain notwithstanding. I’m excited about this change, and curious to see what it will be like to get back into “the shop.”
In my practicing, I keep it light but keep it connected. Avoid pushing. If I tire easily, something is not lined up correctly, so stop and reassess. Start my sessions with warmups and familiar pieces in order to remind my voice how it works. Then sing the new stuff with that same voice. If I jump into the deep end, I’ll only be fighting my resonance and placement, rather than working with it.
I stay aware of my body. Don’t look down (deep in concentration) when starting a phrase; keep the face lifted. Don’t curve the shoulders (another “thinking, working” posture); let the torso be buoyant. Practice in front of a mirror in order to keep those damn concentration wrinkles OFF of my forehead!!
In my performance, I just do what I do. If I bring this kind of mental activity onto the stage with me, I won’t be able to be in the moment with the music or my colleagues or the audience. I’m not falling apart; I can still sing. In those moments of performance, I need to just trust that and enjoy doing what I do. (Also, I’m not singing Marguerite tomorrow; I can sing 1st Alms Collector very well right now!)
Ok, I feel better. I can do this. I can work through this transition. It’s scary to feel like I don’t know where I’m going, but I need to remember that I’m the one in control here. Slow and steady and all those good things... and deep breaths.
Showing posts with label career development. Show all posts
Showing posts with label career development. Show all posts
Friday, October 23, 2009
Tuesday, January 08, 2008
Miscellany for January 8
So much on my mind these days; time for bullet points!
* 2008 is, as of now, booked withfive six new roles (four five Leading, one Featured) so far, with three one more major role possibility (two Leading, one Featured) on the table. Gulp. As contracts get signed, I’ll post details here (and on my website, as soon as I get an ftp client for my Mac…). **UPDATE: I just got a call from my manager, and it seems a new hat has been thrown in the ring! I've been asked to come take over for a cancelled singer. For a huge role. In March. Double gulp!!
* Nothing like the best seat in the house to make one a Wagner fan. I experienced my first Wagner opera last night, Die Walkure, and I think I’ve been changed. I was nervous about making it through a five-hour evening (four hours of music plus two intermissions), but when the curtain closed on our sleeping Brunnhilde, I immediately wanted to watch the next one! Talk about a cliff-hanger… I had a beautiful view of the pit, too, and was blown away by the musicality that poured out. The English horn solos, especially, were so beautiful (I thought of you, Patti!), and what can I saw about all that brass? Awesome. I know I’ll never sing anything (maybe the Forest Bird, and wouldn’t that be poetic?), but I will be an appreciative audience member for the rest of my life. Many many thanks to my hosts for a wonderful evening.
* The growth of the “indie classical” movement continues on apace with the launch of New Amsterdam Records' new website. Streaming tracks from all of their current releases and creating a “join the community” feel by allowing anyone to create a profile, the site includes concert listings, blog postings, and, of course, an online store. It’s not a requirement that you be a NAR artist to post your information, so this will hopefully become a central “meeting ground” of sorts for musicians involved in this development of concert music.
I encourage you to spend some time letting the site’s music player run on shuffle for a while; you’ll get a nice cross-section of the music that is pushing this movement. (JL, I think you will especially enjoy Sam Sadigursky’s The Words Project.)
* I was motivated by the invitation to join the NAR site to finally get the tracks from the May 07 Bhakti recital cleaned up. You can hear a couple of them on my NAR page (Bolcom’s “Waitin” and Barber’s “St. Ita's Vision”), along with a more “traditionally new music-y” song from my stint at Tanglewood in 2004, Grace Choi’s “hist wist.” I’ve also updated my MySpace page tracks, including “Waitin” and adding a Harbison tune, “Why Mira can't go back to her old house.”
(The recording of Hillula, the centerpiece of the recital, is very good, but not ready for public consumption. It reminded the three of us how much we loved the piece, though, and has spurred us on for the next phase: revisions and 2nd recital plans are underway!)
That’s all for now. More thoughts on said “indie classical movement” coming soon…
* 2008 is, as of now, booked with
* Nothing like the best seat in the house to make one a Wagner fan. I experienced my first Wagner opera last night, Die Walkure, and I think I’ve been changed. I was nervous about making it through a five-hour evening (four hours of music plus two intermissions), but when the curtain closed on our sleeping Brunnhilde, I immediately wanted to watch the next one! Talk about a cliff-hanger… I had a beautiful view of the pit, too, and was blown away by the musicality that poured out. The English horn solos, especially, were so beautiful (I thought of you, Patti!), and what can I saw about all that brass? Awesome. I know I’ll never sing anything (maybe the Forest Bird, and wouldn’t that be poetic?), but I will be an appreciative audience member for the rest of my life. Many many thanks to my hosts for a wonderful evening.
* The growth of the “indie classical” movement continues on apace with the launch of New Amsterdam Records' new website. Streaming tracks from all of their current releases and creating a “join the community” feel by allowing anyone to create a profile, the site includes concert listings, blog postings, and, of course, an online store. It’s not a requirement that you be a NAR artist to post your information, so this will hopefully become a central “meeting ground” of sorts for musicians involved in this development of concert music.
I encourage you to spend some time letting the site’s music player run on shuffle for a while; you’ll get a nice cross-section of the music that is pushing this movement. (JL, I think you will especially enjoy Sam Sadigursky’s The Words Project.)
* I was motivated by the invitation to join the NAR site to finally get the tracks from the May 07 Bhakti recital cleaned up. You can hear a couple of them on my NAR page (Bolcom’s “Waitin” and Barber’s “St. Ita's Vision”), along with a more “traditionally new music-y” song from my stint at Tanglewood in 2004, Grace Choi’s “hist wist.” I’ve also updated my MySpace page tracks, including “Waitin” and adding a Harbison tune, “Why Mira can't go back to her old house.”
(The recording of Hillula, the centerpiece of the recital, is very good, but not ready for public consumption. It reminded the three of us how much we loved the piece, though, and has spurred us on for the next phase: revisions and 2nd recital plans are underway!)
That’s all for now. More thoughts on said “indie classical movement” coming soon…
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Learned and Learning
To wrap up the year, here is a list of things I that learned in 2007 and things I am still learning:
* Boundaries are very important, both personal and professional. I’m learning how to say no, not just maybe. This applies to gigs, dates, projects, even auditions. I need to take time and think about how each “yes” will affect the big picture of what I want my path to look like, both my career path and my life path. I’m thinking about starting up with talk therapy again to help me with this new phase of my career and my life.
* Heartbreaks are inevitable. Good girlfriends are priceless.
* I’m enjoying learning how to be environmentally responsible. Living in NYC, my carbon footprint is already lower than average, but I’ve started timing my showers (4-6 minutes most days), carrying stylish Envirosax in all my purses instead of using store plastic bags for purchases, taking non-stop flights - or the train! - whenever possible, unplugging my electronics. It feels good.
* Writing an item on my “To Do” list over and over does not get it accomplished any faster. I’m determined not to carry-over any “to do’s” into 2008, so this next week should be a productive one (she says hopefully)! I still owe many of you your Fractured Atlas receipts for your generous Bhakti Project donations; rest assured you will have them well before tax-time, and likely before you get your tax documents from your employers!
*As much as I love to perform, nothing beats seeing a show. Indie rock, Broadway, opera, symphony, recital… I saw some wonderful performances this year and hope to see more next year.
*Hard work pays off, but usually with more hard work to come. A satisfying cycle.
Here is a list of favorite posts from the year. Many of them seem to involve discoveries, too, so I’ve listed the post and what I feel it says I learned. It was a year of growth and learning, like any good year should be.
Beware explosive consonants - What I learned is right there in the title.
The Song of the Lark - We read to see our lives through others’ eyes.
Blocking - Some things I learned long ago are still with me.
Kitchen Sink - I blog to see my life through the lens of the Moment.
A Day In the Life - I love my job and my life in NYC.
Home, On the Road - I can also live well on the road.
Doing vs. Being - Just Be It.
Dear Friend, Leaving So Soon - Some people never leave you.
Lifelines - See above about girlfriends.
My Sweet Manhattan Hometown - Nothing beats a live performance!
The Evolution of the Headshot - Change is good.
Shimmering, Sparkling - It’s ok to be bold and daring!
a Dream - It is possible to be a bit too focused...
Finale - All good things come to an end.
2007 was the year of my Met Debut: Part 1: Leading Up, Part 2: Performance, and Part 3: After Party
And that of a small recital project that ate my life. Here is the Bhakti Project Year in Review. What did I learn through this experience? Hopefully that will be evident next year as the project continues, but mostly I learned, as with all of these things, that I have a lot to learn.
Happy New Year, everyone!!
* Boundaries are very important, both personal and professional. I’m learning how to say no, not just maybe. This applies to gigs, dates, projects, even auditions. I need to take time and think about how each “yes” will affect the big picture of what I want my path to look like, both my career path and my life path. I’m thinking about starting up with talk therapy again to help me with this new phase of my career and my life.
* Heartbreaks are inevitable. Good girlfriends are priceless.
* I’m enjoying learning how to be environmentally responsible. Living in NYC, my carbon footprint is already lower than average, but I’ve started timing my showers (4-6 minutes most days), carrying stylish Envirosax in all my purses instead of using store plastic bags for purchases, taking non-stop flights - or the train! - whenever possible, unplugging my electronics. It feels good.
* Writing an item on my “To Do” list over and over does not get it accomplished any faster. I’m determined not to carry-over any “to do’s” into 2008, so this next week should be a productive one (she says hopefully)! I still owe many of you your Fractured Atlas receipts for your generous Bhakti Project donations; rest assured you will have them well before tax-time, and likely before you get your tax documents from your employers!
*As much as I love to perform, nothing beats seeing a show. Indie rock, Broadway, opera, symphony, recital… I saw some wonderful performances this year and hope to see more next year.
*Hard work pays off, but usually with more hard work to come. A satisfying cycle.
Here is a list of favorite posts from the year. Many of them seem to involve discoveries, too, so I’ve listed the post and what I feel it says I learned. It was a year of growth and learning, like any good year should be.
Beware explosive consonants - What I learned is right there in the title.
The Song of the Lark - We read to see our lives through others’ eyes.
Blocking - Some things I learned long ago are still with me.
Kitchen Sink - I blog to see my life through the lens of the Moment.
A Day In the Life - I love my job and my life in NYC.
Home, On the Road - I can also live well on the road.
Doing vs. Being - Just Be It.
Dear Friend, Leaving So Soon - Some people never leave you.
Lifelines - See above about girlfriends.
My Sweet Manhattan Hometown - Nothing beats a live performance!
The Evolution of the Headshot - Change is good.
Shimmering, Sparkling - It’s ok to be bold and daring!
a Dream - It is possible to be a bit too focused...
Finale - All good things come to an end.
2007 was the year of my Met Debut: Part 1: Leading Up, Part 2: Performance, and Part 3: After Party
And that of a small recital project that ate my life. Here is the Bhakti Project Year in Review. What did I learn through this experience? Hopefully that will be evident next year as the project continues, but mostly I learned, as with all of these things, that I have a lot to learn.
Happy New Year, everyone!!
Thursday, December 13, 2007
Goes to show
You can just never tell. I sang an audition last week on a day when I felt terrible, not physically sick, but totally down in the dumps. The uncertainty of this season - auditions and the implied rejection that comes with them, making decisions about the direction of my career - coupled with nasty weather, a mouse in my apartment, not getting to leave town for the holidays, etc., has made for a rough couple of weeks.
On this day, I felt like I probably sang ok, but didn’t walk out of the audition room feeling like I’d nailed it, or even like I’d “done my best.” It was an off day. I’m generally pleased with my auditions, but this day I was in. a. funk. My manager even said that she could tell, not in the way I sang or performed in the audition, but she could sense that my energy was just “off.”
And yet: today she told me I got an offer from that company! A good one, too. A standard rep kind of role, and not in English, even! I’m excited and encouraged, and more than a little surprised. Sometimes you are just not aware of what you’re putting out there, you know? I am learning that I am well-trained enough - vocally, mentally, and in general performance aspects - that even on an off day, I know how to do my job well. My job is to sing, to tell a story, and I can do it, even when conditions are less than ideal. A good lesson to learn...
2008 is filling up very nicely, and there are more inquiries on the table moving into 2009. Hopefully this period of uncertainty is coming to an end. (Rest assured, though, there will be others!) I’ve been spending good times with good friends, trying to get the most out of the other season that’s currently taking over NYC: Christmas!
On this day, I felt like I probably sang ok, but didn’t walk out of the audition room feeling like I’d nailed it, or even like I’d “done my best.” It was an off day. I’m generally pleased with my auditions, but this day I was in. a. funk. My manager even said that she could tell, not in the way I sang or performed in the audition, but she could sense that my energy was just “off.”
And yet: today she told me I got an offer from that company! A good one, too. A standard rep kind of role, and not in English, even! I’m excited and encouraged, and more than a little surprised. Sometimes you are just not aware of what you’re putting out there, you know? I am learning that I am well-trained enough - vocally, mentally, and in general performance aspects - that even on an off day, I know how to do my job well. My job is to sing, to tell a story, and I can do it, even when conditions are less than ideal. A good lesson to learn...
2008 is filling up very nicely, and there are more inquiries on the table moving into 2009. Hopefully this period of uncertainty is coming to an end. (Rest assured, though, there will be others!) I’ve been spending good times with good friends, trying to get the most out of the other season that’s currently taking over NYC: Christmas!
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
Check, check
I got an email yesterday afternoon from one of the producers of WNYC’s daily music show, Soundcheck asking me if I’d be interested in joining a discussion about marketing classical musicians – for today’s show! We exchanged a few emails and phone calls about coordinating things and potential topics for discussion, and then at 1:45 today I did a phone check and we were on – live!
I had to be at the Met for a potential brush-up rehearsal, so we conducted the interview via phone from my dressing room. I was officially released from rehearsal just as we were getting started, so I was able to relax and not worry about having to cut things short and run to the stage (to the pit, actually, but more about that soon).
Joining me in a “round table” discussion with our host, John Schaefer, were pianist Jonathan Biss and publicist Albert Imperato. (Oops, I just realized that I referred to Albert as “Alberto” at one point, combining his names! Sorry, Albert, if you’re reading!)
If you’d like to hear what we all have to say about cultivating (or not) an image as a classical musician, you can listen on the website or download the podcast from iTunes. It was a fun and interesting conversation, one that could have continued much longer than the 20 minutes or so we had today. One point I will reiterate here is something that was said a few different ways on the program: no matter how polished or well-thought-out or “hip” your image is, what the audience is really coming to experience is your musicianship. If I can’t sing with artistry, it doesn’t matter how stylish I am; if I can’t move you with my voice, writing an interesting blog isn’t going to help. But there’s no reason I can’t aim for all of it!
Which leads me to the fact that this morning I was faced with the question: what do you wear for a radio interview? In reality, it doesn’t matter; I just dressed for another day, but I chose to wear my purple dress to help celebrate ROCKTOBERFEST!!!!!! Thanks to AG for the heads’ up on that great article. This is a season for the record books, my friends.
Welcome to all the visitors finding their way here from the WNYC site! Make yourselves at home: please explore the archives; check out my friends and colleagues on the blogroll; learn about The Bhakti Project, my collaboration with Jocelyn Dueck and Judd Greenstein which I mentioned in the interview. Please consider making a donation!
Teaser: tomorrow I’ll announce the next performance of Hillula, Judd’s gorgeous piece. It’s soon!! Stay tuned...
I had to be at the Met for a potential brush-up rehearsal, so we conducted the interview via phone from my dressing room. I was officially released from rehearsal just as we were getting started, so I was able to relax and not worry about having to cut things short and run to the stage (to the pit, actually, but more about that soon).
Joining me in a “round table” discussion with our host, John Schaefer, were pianist Jonathan Biss and publicist Albert Imperato. (Oops, I just realized that I referred to Albert as “Alberto” at one point, combining his names! Sorry, Albert, if you’re reading!)
If you’d like to hear what we all have to say about cultivating (or not) an image as a classical musician, you can listen on the website or download the podcast from iTunes. It was a fun and interesting conversation, one that could have continued much longer than the 20 minutes or so we had today. One point I will reiterate here is something that was said a few different ways on the program: no matter how polished or well-thought-out or “hip” your image is, what the audience is really coming to experience is your musicianship. If I can’t sing with artistry, it doesn’t matter how stylish I am; if I can’t move you with my voice, writing an interesting blog isn’t going to help. But there’s no reason I can’t aim for all of it!
Which leads me to the fact that this morning I was faced with the question: what do you wear for a radio interview? In reality, it doesn’t matter; I just dressed for another day, but I chose to wear my purple dress to help celebrate ROCKTOBERFEST!!!!!! Thanks to AG for the heads’ up on that great article. This is a season for the record books, my friends.
Welcome to all the visitors finding their way here from the WNYC site! Make yourselves at home: please explore the archives; check out my friends and colleagues on the blogroll; learn about The Bhakti Project, my collaboration with Jocelyn Dueck and Judd Greenstein which I mentioned in the interview. Please consider making a donation!
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Volpone pics
Finally got some pictures from Volpone up on my website! You can check them out here: ACB.com Photo Page.
As I continue to dream up the next incarnation of my website, a more streamlined photo page is definitely on the list of "must haves." Incorporating this blog into ACB.com, is on the list, too, I think. Major overhaul!! Bring it on.
Those of you in Boulder, ask my parents if they remember seeing this look ever... I was a "histrionic" child, afterall! (Love you, Dad!)
FriPod on Wednesday coming up...
As I continue to dream up the next incarnation of my website, a more streamlined photo page is definitely on the list of "must haves." Incorporating this blog into ACB.com, is on the list, too, I think. Major overhaul!! Bring it on.
Those of you in Boulder, ask my parents if they remember seeing this look ever... I was a "histrionic" child, afterall! (Love you, Dad!)
FriPod on Wednesday coming up...
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
A dose
In the last 24 hours or so I’ve gotten a couple of reminders that nothing in this career is guaranteed, that I can take nothing for granted. Just some disappointing news – a offered gig I can’t accept and not making the first round a competition I really want to do this year – nothing earth-shattering or devastating or career-ending by any means. A dose of reality.
These little “reminders” seem to come along every so often, and as disappointing as they are, they do help put things into perspective. This is my Job; I have to Work for the things I want! They don’t just come knocking on the door uninvited.
So, back to work! Yesterday I did some updating of my website, adding some performance info and finally getting a working link for Regnava on the Downloads page. (Also there: links to buy Ainadamar and Long Road Home via Amazon.) The recording of Regnava is about a year old now; I’m hoping to get a few new things recorded this fall. Something else to add to the “to do” list!
I’ll get some new pictures up on the site today, I hope. There are some great shots from Volpone, and, of course, the new headshots. Today I’ll be playing with Photoshop and Dreamweaver in between playing with Brahms, Rachmaninoff, Chambers, and Mozart…
These little “reminders” seem to come along every so often, and as disappointing as they are, they do help put things into perspective. This is my Job; I have to Work for the things I want! They don’t just come knocking on the door uninvited.
So, back to work! Yesterday I did some updating of my website, adding some performance info and finally getting a working link for Regnava on the Downloads page. (Also there: links to buy Ainadamar and Long Road Home via Amazon.) The recording of Regnava is about a year old now; I’m hoping to get a few new things recorded this fall. Something else to add to the “to do” list!
I’ll get some new pictures up on the site today, I hope. There are some great shots from Volpone, and, of course, the new headshots. Today I’ll be playing with Photoshop and Dreamweaver in between playing with Brahms, Rachmaninoff, Chambers, and Mozart…
Thursday, September 27, 2007
Unexpected
In the past week or so there have been a few unexpected and lovely surprises come my way.
Late last week: An email from a friend complimenting me on a picture in Opera News. I went to check it out at the Met store (since my copy had yet to arrive), expecting to see a Volpone review, although I couldn’t figure why they’d use a picture of me for that. Turns out it wasn’t a review, but rather a nice blurb in the front of the magazine about Long Road Home, the Parkinson’s’ Benefit CD we recorded last summer in Santa Fe. It’s available now from the US Amazon.com, so no need to pay international shipping. Remember, a good chunk of these profits go to Parkinson’s’ research, so pick up a few copies and spread the love.
Sunday: I attended a performance of William Bolcom and Joan Morris performing the entire canon of Bolcom’s cabaret songs, the guest of a certain librettist and playwright. We attended a party afterwards at the Chelsea Hotel, and I got to sit on the floor and listen to composers talk and singers sing and people laugh. The most special moment came, though, when I got to thank Mr. Bolcom for “Waitin’.” It’s a perfect page of music, to my mind, and a song that holds a very special place in my heart. What a gift to be able to let him know that, to thank him for enriching my life with his music.
Monday: A delightful lunch with a patron, who had asked to meet with me in order to give me a gift/grant from his foundation. The Julian Autrey Song Foundation has presented several young singers in recital over the past few years, among them my friends Jesse Blumberg and Matthew Worth, and Joseph Kaiser, who makes his Met debut this season. Recently, the Foundation has started extending grants, as well, and I am now a grateful recipient. The money comes with no spending stipulations; it is simply a “support” grant, a gift of patronage. Thank you, JASF!
Wednesday: Tagging along on a shopping trip with KG, visiting from Seattle, I was only looking for a new fall dress, an autumnal version of what I’ve been living in for the past few months. I found one, within my budget, even: a luscious LaROK jersey knit in a dark khaki, drapy and flowy. The unexpected thing came in the form of a stunning Badgley Mishka gown that KG “made” me try on! She reminded me of my May concerts in Atlanta, and this dress will be perfect: a deep, rich teal with darker undertones; “mermaid” style skirt with a small train; halter neck with incredible details on the bodice: pleats, beads… It’s amazing. I don’t have anything like it in my current “gown wardrobe,” not in color or style or quality.
And, of course, it was on sale for about 30% of full price! Remember that unexpected grant? Uh-huh. A perfect use for it! I came home and promptly emailed my patron to tell him of my find, and he was glad to hear it. I wouldn’t have bought the gown without the grant, and a gown like this definitely makes me feel “legit,” like a “diva” in every good sense of the word. Pictures to come!
I’d better write up a blurb about Figaro rehearsals before I go to bed or I’m going to get skinned! Stay tuned…
Late last week: An email from a friend complimenting me on a picture in Opera News. I went to check it out at the Met store (since my copy had yet to arrive), expecting to see a Volpone review, although I couldn’t figure why they’d use a picture of me for that. Turns out it wasn’t a review, but rather a nice blurb in the front of the magazine about Long Road Home, the Parkinson’s’ Benefit CD we recorded last summer in Santa Fe. It’s available now from the US Amazon.com, so no need to pay international shipping. Remember, a good chunk of these profits go to Parkinson’s’ research, so pick up a few copies and spread the love.
Sunday: I attended a performance of William Bolcom and Joan Morris performing the entire canon of Bolcom’s cabaret songs, the guest of a certain librettist and playwright. We attended a party afterwards at the Chelsea Hotel, and I got to sit on the floor and listen to composers talk and singers sing and people laugh. The most special moment came, though, when I got to thank Mr. Bolcom for “Waitin’.” It’s a perfect page of music, to my mind, and a song that holds a very special place in my heart. What a gift to be able to let him know that, to thank him for enriching my life with his music.
Monday: A delightful lunch with a patron, who had asked to meet with me in order to give me a gift/grant from his foundation. The Julian Autrey Song Foundation has presented several young singers in recital over the past few years, among them my friends Jesse Blumberg and Matthew Worth, and Joseph Kaiser, who makes his Met debut this season. Recently, the Foundation has started extending grants, as well, and I am now a grateful recipient. The money comes with no spending stipulations; it is simply a “support” grant, a gift of patronage. Thank you, JASF!
Wednesday: Tagging along on a shopping trip with KG, visiting from Seattle, I was only looking for a new fall dress, an autumnal version of what I’ve been living in for the past few months. I found one, within my budget, even: a luscious LaROK jersey knit in a dark khaki, drapy and flowy. The unexpected thing came in the form of a stunning Badgley Mishka gown that KG “made” me try on! She reminded me of my May concerts in Atlanta, and this dress will be perfect: a deep, rich teal with darker undertones; “mermaid” style skirt with a small train; halter neck with incredible details on the bodice: pleats, beads… It’s amazing. I don’t have anything like it in my current “gown wardrobe,” not in color or style or quality.
And, of course, it was on sale for about 30% of full price! Remember that unexpected grant? Uh-huh. A perfect use for it! I came home and promptly emailed my patron to tell him of my find, and he was glad to hear it. I wouldn’t have bought the gown without the grant, and a gown like this definitely makes me feel “legit,” like a “diva” in every good sense of the word. Pictures to come!
I’d better write up a blurb about Figaro rehearsals before I go to bed or I’m going to get skinned! Stay tuned…
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Two more
** I talked with a couple of colleagues this week about how we spend our days. Specifically, how hard it is to explain to someone who only understands the “9-5” concept of a job.
One of the guys put it this way: “I figure I have three things I need to do everyday to keep my career on track: maintain my appearance, maintain my voice, and learn new music.” So, that means: work out, practice, study. If you get up at a “normal hour,” you can have all of these things finished before lunch! Depending, of course, on how much new music you have to learn…
I would add some element of “the business” to this equation – emails, phone calls, dealing with materials and contracts and websites, writing my blog – but otherwise I agree. As I’m getting more serious about working out (two “runs” and two yoga classes in the past week!), I can see myself creating a schedule for my “days off” that incorporates these four elements.
** Today I had a friend call me “the hardest working girl,” in terms of my rapidly-filling-up season. Maybe it’s because of all the free time that the above schedule allows, or maybe it’s because I just love my job, but I always feel like I could be – should be – working harder. Like I’m not really doing what I’m supposed to be doing, and someday I’m going to show up for a gig and they’re going to say “How dare you show up so unprepared?” and I’ll get fired and my career will be over.
Ok, that’s maybe a bit melodramatic, but I’ve had the thought! I mentioned this to a mentor this summer, and he shared that another singer had expressed a similar fear about starting a new program, afraid the she would show up and get “found out,” that she didn’t really belong there. My mentor was surprised to learn that she felt this way, as she seemed very confident – and ready! He went on to tell me of an article that talked about the psychology of successful people, and many of them share this fear. Why is that?
I can only think that it really does have something to do with loving what we do. It’s fun, I enjoy it, I love the people I work with and the projects I get to be involved in. How can something I love so much be work? I must not being doing something right, ‘cuz “work” is supposed to be a drag, right?
I guess when it starts to feel like work, it’s time to take that yoga teacher training course!
One of the guys put it this way: “I figure I have three things I need to do everyday to keep my career on track: maintain my appearance, maintain my voice, and learn new music.” So, that means: work out, practice, study. If you get up at a “normal hour,” you can have all of these things finished before lunch! Depending, of course, on how much new music you have to learn…
I would add some element of “the business” to this equation – emails, phone calls, dealing with materials and contracts and websites, writing my blog – but otherwise I agree. As I’m getting more serious about working out (two “runs” and two yoga classes in the past week!), I can see myself creating a schedule for my “days off” that incorporates these four elements.
** Today I had a friend call me “the hardest working girl,” in terms of my rapidly-filling-up season. Maybe it’s because of all the free time that the above schedule allows, or maybe it’s because I just love my job, but I always feel like I could be – should be – working harder. Like I’m not really doing what I’m supposed to be doing, and someday I’m going to show up for a gig and they’re going to say “How dare you show up so unprepared?” and I’ll get fired and my career will be over.
Ok, that’s maybe a bit melodramatic, but I’ve had the thought! I mentioned this to a mentor this summer, and he shared that another singer had expressed a similar fear about starting a new program, afraid the she would show up and get “found out,” that she didn’t really belong there. My mentor was surprised to learn that she felt this way, as she seemed very confident – and ready! He went on to tell me of an article that talked about the psychology of successful people, and many of them share this fear. Why is that?
I can only think that it really does have something to do with loving what we do. It’s fun, I enjoy it, I love the people I work with and the projects I get to be involved in. How can something I love so much be work? I must not being doing something right, ‘cuz “work” is supposed to be a drag, right?
I guess when it starts to feel like work, it’s time to take that yoga teacher training course!
Sunday, September 09, 2007
The Evolution of the Headshot
I finally selected my new headshots this week, and I’m very happy with them both. My goal with these new shots was to get something that I thought better represented The Real Me, which is a bit less foofy than my current formal shot and a bit more smiley than the casual one.
But before we get to the new shots (taken and edited by Alexander Vasiljev), let’s take a trip down memory lane and see how my headshot has evolved over the years. (Click to see larger pics.)
Umm, yikes. I’ve kind of got helmet hair, and, wow, is that a boring shot or what? I didn’t know any better, though, and at the time (2000, early grad school) I had no real sense of what my “personal style” was all about. And that in dark sweater, with no contours in my pose, I look kind of, well, thick. Not flattering. I was happy to leave this shot behind!
The next step, another casual shot, taken about two years later. First off, you can tell it’s a better photo, better lighting, printing, photographer, everything. Much more polished, grown-up. I still really like this shot, but it feels a little cold to me. Maybe it’s ‘cuz I’m not really smiling. And, besides, my hair is never that straight anymore, never that controlled!
This one I hate. People seem to love it, but I think I just look like I’m playing dress-up, like I’m Cinderella on her way to the ball, about to be discovered for the peasant girl that she is. This is what I thought an opera singer was supposed to look like – gown, sparklies, tendrils. In truth, it’s not that far off from what I look like these days when I’m all dolled up for a concert, minus the tendrils, so I can’t put my finger on what exactly I don’t like about it.
My main beef with both of those shots is that they just don’t “feel like me.” I’ve talked about that veneer that I felt I used to have? It’s shining brightly in these pictures. Again, happy to leave that behind…
How ‘bout this? That looks like me, feels like me, don’t you think?
And this one, too. There’s a bit of sass in this one, I like that, something in my eyes that says “I have a secret!” The sparklies in this shot are family antiques, recently given to me by my father's mother; they belonged to her great aunt (right, Mom?), so that makes them from my great-great-great aunt. (The necklace in the first shot was a gift from my sister, and is one of my favorite pieces. And, of course, the dresses in both shots are butter by Nadia!)
Both shots, to my mind, capture the singer that might walk into an audition or a rehearsal, hint at the performer that will be onstage, and truly represent the everyday ACB. (I have both shots in black & white, too, for print usage; color is better for online.)
Thanks, Sasha! Now I feel like I need a new website…
But before we get to the new shots (taken and edited by Alexander Vasiljev), let’s take a trip down memory lane and see how my headshot has evolved over the years. (Click to see larger pics.)
Umm, yikes. I’ve kind of got helmet hair, and, wow, is that a boring shot or what? I didn’t know any better, though, and at the time (2000, early grad school) I had no real sense of what my “personal style” was all about. And that in dark sweater, with no contours in my pose, I look kind of, well, thick. Not flattering. I was happy to leave this shot behind!
The next step, another casual shot, taken about two years later. First off, you can tell it’s a better photo, better lighting, printing, photographer, everything. Much more polished, grown-up. I still really like this shot, but it feels a little cold to me. Maybe it’s ‘cuz I’m not really smiling. And, besides, my hair is never that straight anymore, never that controlled!
This one I hate. People seem to love it, but I think I just look like I’m playing dress-up, like I’m Cinderella on her way to the ball, about to be discovered for the peasant girl that she is. This is what I thought an opera singer was supposed to look like – gown, sparklies, tendrils. In truth, it’s not that far off from what I look like these days when I’m all dolled up for a concert, minus the tendrils, so I can’t put my finger on what exactly I don’t like about it. My main beef with both of those shots is that they just don’t “feel like me.” I’ve talked about that veneer that I felt I used to have? It’s shining brightly in these pictures. Again, happy to leave that behind…
How ‘bout this? That looks like me, feels like me, don’t you think? 
And this one, too. There’s a bit of sass in this one, I like that, something in my eyes that says “I have a secret!” The sparklies in this shot are family antiques, recently given to me by my father's mother; they belonged to her great aunt (right, Mom?), so that makes them from my great-great-great aunt. (The necklace in the first shot was a gift from my sister, and is one of my favorite pieces. And, of course, the dresses in both shots are butter by Nadia!)Both shots, to my mind, capture the singer that might walk into an audition or a rehearsal, hint at the performer that will be onstage, and truly represent the everyday ACB. (I have both shots in black & white, too, for print usage; color is better for online.)
Thanks, Sasha! Now I feel like I need a new website…
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Figaro
Taking a break from getting settled back into my little hobbit hole (what a difference a window fan/AC unit makes!) to clear up some Figaro confusion.
Just as the 06-07 season was my Year of Golijov, this season is going to be the Year of Figaro. Two different productions, two roles, and in an arrangement which I couldn’t have set out more perfectly. Here it is in black and white:
October: cover Barbarina in the Met’s Le Nozze di Figaro
November: sing Barbarina in same production (also a show on Dec. 1)
February: sing Susanna in Opera Grand Rapid’s Le Nozze di Figaro
Cover, observe, sing, observe some more, sing. Fantastic! I’ll get to start slowly, with Barbarina’s four or five pages of recit and two-page aria, which feels like an appetizer (an “amuse bouche,” even?) for the whole role of Susanna.
I know the assistant conductor for the Met Figaro, and I intend to ask him if I can sit in on rehearsals for which I’m not called so I can immerse myself in the music. I figure the more I can hear of the recit and the different ways the singers approach it, the better. I’ll be observing two different Susannas, and I’m excited to take notes on things like characterization and musical choices, but also to watch their methods for getting through this enormous role. How do they pace themselves? When do they “rest” and when do they go all out? The opportunity to observe this role close up for three months before I perform it myself is invaluable.
So, there you have it. I’m sorry I didn’t get this spelled out before tickets went on sale. I know some folks have tickets for the October run; hopefully you’ll find the production enjoyable enough to come back and see it again in November!
Just as the 06-07 season was my Year of Golijov, this season is going to be the Year of Figaro. Two different productions, two roles, and in an arrangement which I couldn’t have set out more perfectly. Here it is in black and white:
October: cover Barbarina in the Met’s Le Nozze di Figaro
November: sing Barbarina in same production (also a show on Dec. 1)
February: sing Susanna in Opera Grand Rapid’s Le Nozze di Figaro
Cover, observe, sing, observe some more, sing. Fantastic! I’ll get to start slowly, with Barbarina’s four or five pages of recit and two-page aria, which feels like an appetizer (an “amuse bouche,” even?) for the whole role of Susanna.
I know the assistant conductor for the Met Figaro, and I intend to ask him if I can sit in on rehearsals for which I’m not called so I can immerse myself in the music. I figure the more I can hear of the recit and the different ways the singers approach it, the better. I’ll be observing two different Susannas, and I’m excited to take notes on things like characterization and musical choices, but also to watch their methods for getting through this enormous role. How do they pace themselves? When do they “rest” and when do they go all out? The opportunity to observe this role close up for three months before I perform it myself is invaluable.
So, there you have it. I’m sorry I didn’t get this spelled out before tickets went on sale. I know some folks have tickets for the October run; hopefully you’ll find the production enjoyable enough to come back and see it again in November!
Thursday, August 16, 2007
The Week in Re/Preview
This has been – and will continue to be – a busy week! Here’s a Hump Day recap and look ahead.
Monday: all day Italian coaching with FG, Wolf Trap’s Italian coach and astute reader of The Concert. And when I say “all day,” I mean all. day. Oy! My brain was fried by 5pm. Even with a fabulous lunch (a “family style” feast of pasta with lemon and herbs from the garden, cheese, roasted summer veggies, a glass of wine AND a pre-lunch cocktail, all lovingly prepared by FG) and a dip in the pool, it was a tough day. She pulled no punches, repeatedly (but gently) reminding me to
- keep my “ee” vowel skinny
- keep my “ah” vowel bright
- keep my r’s and l’s crisp, not lazy
- remember to speak through the conversation, not just to the end of my line. Duh. I know this; why is it so much harder in Italian?!
Tuesday: photo shoot!! I finally went in for some new headshots. I’m gathering opinions (shot 139 seems to be a favorite…) and will likely have my choices made by early next week. The photographer is an old friend, Alexander Vasiljev, aka Sasha, who has been my makeup artist through three summers now: both summers at Tanglewood (the first Ainadamar and Midsummer Night’s Dream) and here for Volpone. I loved having someone who knows me behind the camera, someone who could make me smile my real smile. He just won a major photography competition, too, for his nature photography. Congrats, Sasha!
Wednesday: High Mass at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception. What a gorgeous church! I went to hear Charles sing with the professional choir there, and as he promised, the music was fantastic. (What was that final piece, Charles? Love it.) I dragged KG along to see all the beautiful mosaics, and they did not disappoint. Incredible detail, such vibrant colors. Our Lady of Siluva was one of many breath-taking chapels, but our favorite might have to be Our Lady of China. (Follow the link and scroll down.)
Thursday: road trip to NYC with YL. Install an air conditioner in the window across from my tiny room so I don’t roast up in the loft in these last days of summer. Then a date!
Friday: audition, then head back to VA for the weekend. My friends will be putting on the final WTOC performances – Magic Flute – and I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I heard a run-through last week, and the singing is out of this world.
Saturday: Flute performance (yay!) and final after party (boo!).
Sunday: more pre-season NFL while writing translations into my Figaro score, then one last dinner with my amazing hosts. They’re splitting time between VA and NYC these days, so we already have plans for a monthly dinner – and they’ll be coming to see Figaro for CH’s birthday!
I’ll putz around here for the weekend, trying to wrap up selling my car and spending more time with Susanna. Then on Monday or Tuesday, my time here is done!
“Where has the time all gone to?” Indeed.
Monday: all day Italian coaching with FG, Wolf Trap’s Italian coach and astute reader of The Concert. And when I say “all day,” I mean all. day. Oy! My brain was fried by 5pm. Even with a fabulous lunch (a “family style” feast of pasta with lemon and herbs from the garden, cheese, roasted summer veggies, a glass of wine AND a pre-lunch cocktail, all lovingly prepared by FG) and a dip in the pool, it was a tough day. She pulled no punches, repeatedly (but gently) reminding me to
- keep my “ee” vowel skinny
- keep my “ah” vowel bright
- keep my r’s and l’s crisp, not lazy
- remember to speak through the conversation, not just to the end of my line. Duh. I know this; why is it so much harder in Italian?!
Tuesday: photo shoot!! I finally went in for some new headshots. I’m gathering opinions (shot 139 seems to be a favorite…) and will likely have my choices made by early next week. The photographer is an old friend, Alexander Vasiljev, aka Sasha, who has been my makeup artist through three summers now: both summers at Tanglewood (the first Ainadamar and Midsummer Night’s Dream) and here for Volpone. I loved having someone who knows me behind the camera, someone who could make me smile my real smile. He just won a major photography competition, too, for his nature photography. Congrats, Sasha!
Wednesday: High Mass at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception. What a gorgeous church! I went to hear Charles sing with the professional choir there, and as he promised, the music was fantastic. (What was that final piece, Charles? Love it.) I dragged KG along to see all the beautiful mosaics, and they did not disappoint. Incredible detail, such vibrant colors. Our Lady of Siluva was one of many breath-taking chapels, but our favorite might have to be Our Lady of China. (Follow the link and scroll down.)
Thursday: road trip to NYC with YL. Install an air conditioner in the window across from my tiny room so I don’t roast up in the loft in these last days of summer. Then a date!
Friday: audition, then head back to VA for the weekend. My friends will be putting on the final WTOC performances – Magic Flute – and I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I heard a run-through last week, and the singing is out of this world.
Saturday: Flute performance (yay!) and final after party (boo!).
Sunday: more pre-season NFL while writing translations into my Figaro score, then one last dinner with my amazing hosts. They’re splitting time between VA and NYC these days, so we already have plans for a monthly dinner – and they’ll be coming to see Figaro for CH’s birthday!
I’ll putz around here for the weekend, trying to wrap up selling my car and spending more time with Susanna. Then on Monday or Tuesday, my time here is done!
“Where has the time all gone to?” Indeed.
Monday, July 02, 2007
For the Record
It is already way past my bedtime (or what should have been my bedtime tonight), but I’m about to head to Georgia for a few days to visit family and friends, and there is news!
Kim has finally announced on the Wolf Trap blog that we are going to be releasing a recording of Volpone! She’ll be giving a more detailed explanation of the process, and later I’ll share a bit of my experience (we recorded all four of the performances and did a two-hour touch-up session) from the stage side of things. It was an interesting element to add to the mix of performing this challenging and wonderful piece. We had a great final show today; really, a lot of fun. I’ll miss it!
This recording will bring my current “discography” up to four: Griffelkin with Boston Modern Orchestra Project while I was still in school, Ainadamar (which, um, in case you missed it, won a Grammy! I got my certificate just before I came to Wolf Trap. Eeek!), this recording of Volpone, and Long Road Home, the Parkinson’s benefit cd with Bill Barnewitz (we recorded it in Santa Fe last summer; read about it here.)
That cd was just released last week, I think, and while it is currently only available through European distributors (including Amazon.co.uk), please consider buying one. All the proceeds from this amazing collaboration go towards Parkinson’s research.
Featured on Long Road Home are singers Joyce DiDonato (who is now blogging!), Jennifer Holloway, and Eglise Gutierrez (all Cendrillon cast mates); pianists Carol Anderson and Ursula Oppens; and Margaret Butler, oboe; Todd Levy, clarinet; and Ted Soluri, bassoon. Those last four join Bill (who plays horn on all tracks) for an absolutely beautiful performance of Mozart’s Quintet for Piano and Winds, K. 452. It is a gorgeous cd all around, and would be worth picking up even if it weren’t for such a good cause. As soon as I hear of a US distributor, I’ll let you know, but for now, all of you in Europe: buy one!
With two other recordings in the works for next year (including a recording of Hillula and other selections from the Bhakti Project – it’s not too late to make a donation!), I might need to add a Discography page to my website. How cool is that?
Kim has finally announced on the Wolf Trap blog that we are going to be releasing a recording of Volpone! She’ll be giving a more detailed explanation of the process, and later I’ll share a bit of my experience (we recorded all four of the performances and did a two-hour touch-up session) from the stage side of things. It was an interesting element to add to the mix of performing this challenging and wonderful piece. We had a great final show today; really, a lot of fun. I’ll miss it!
This recording will bring my current “discography” up to four: Griffelkin with Boston Modern Orchestra Project while I was still in school, Ainadamar (which, um, in case you missed it, won a Grammy! I got my certificate just before I came to Wolf Trap. Eeek!), this recording of Volpone, and Long Road Home, the Parkinson’s benefit cd with Bill Barnewitz (we recorded it in Santa Fe last summer; read about it here.)
That cd was just released last week, I think, and while it is currently only available through European distributors (including Amazon.co.uk), please consider buying one. All the proceeds from this amazing collaboration go towards Parkinson’s research. Featured on Long Road Home are singers Joyce DiDonato (who is now blogging!), Jennifer Holloway, and Eglise Gutierrez (all Cendrillon cast mates); pianists Carol Anderson and Ursula Oppens; and Margaret Butler, oboe; Todd Levy, clarinet; and Ted Soluri, bassoon. Those last four join Bill (who plays horn on all tracks) for an absolutely beautiful performance of Mozart’s Quintet for Piano and Winds, K. 452. It is a gorgeous cd all around, and would be worth picking up even if it weren’t for such a good cause. As soon as I hear of a US distributor, I’ll let you know, but for now, all of you in Europe: buy one!
With two other recordings in the works for next year (including a recording of Hillula and other selections from the Bhakti Project – it’s not too late to make a donation!), I might need to add a Discography page to my website. How cool is that?
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Time Out
If you live in NYC or its environs, you might want to pick up a copy of this week’s TimeOut New York. If you can get past the racy cover, (sorry, Mom! at least that’s not me…) there’s a profile of Yours Truly at the start of the Classical Music section! For those of you not in the area, it should be available online soon; I’ll post a link when it’s up.
**Edited to add: Here it is! Welcome to those of you who have found your way here from the article! Please spend some time over on the sidebar, checking out the Blogroll, archived posts and The Bhakti Project. Come back often!
Steve Smith, who writes for the NY Times as well as TONY and keeps an in-depth “music consumption” blog over at Night After Night, contacted me a few weeks ago about this feature. I alluded to this in the first Met Debut post; the actual interview happened about two weeks later at the swanky TONY offices on 10th Avenue. We talked for about 45 minutes, I suppose, Steve's tape recorder going all the while, although it was shut off for about a minute while the building tested the fire alarm!
We covered so much history of the blog and my career since grad school, plus a bit of personal life and, of course, The Bhakti Project. I was anticipating a small blurb of an article, as I just couldn’t see how he was going to get all that information into two or three column-inches! And, well, turns out he didn’t have to: it’s a full page feature! There is also a big picture, my casual headshot, and can I just say how weird it is to see myself smiling out from the pages of a major magazine? Pretty weird!
I read the article outloud to EN as we rode the subway down to a wine shop in Tribeca, on a mission to get wine for the (FREE!) wine reception after the recital tomorrow. I had to stop about every other paragraph and look up at him dumbfoundedly (is that a word?). I am so impressed with Steve’s presentation of all the information, some of it very sensitive; his writing is thoughtful and kind, and it’s obvious that he’s been a reader of the concert for quite a while.
Thank you, Steve! I’m honored to have my first profile, in conjunction with my first recital in NY, written by you, and with such care.
I have an hour more here at home before I meet Jocelyn at the gallery for our dress rehearsal. It’s all falling into place! I’m not nervous, per se, but I do feel the need to step up to the plate even more now. Heck, all of New York might show up…
**Edited to add: Here it is! Welcome to those of you who have found your way here from the article! Please spend some time over on the sidebar, checking out the Blogroll, archived posts and The Bhakti Project. Come back often!
Steve Smith, who writes for the NY Times as well as TONY and keeps an in-depth “music consumption” blog over at Night After Night, contacted me a few weeks ago about this feature. I alluded to this in the first Met Debut post; the actual interview happened about two weeks later at the swanky TONY offices on 10th Avenue. We talked for about 45 minutes, I suppose, Steve's tape recorder going all the while, although it was shut off for about a minute while the building tested the fire alarm!
We covered so much history of the blog and my career since grad school, plus a bit of personal life and, of course, The Bhakti Project. I was anticipating a small blurb of an article, as I just couldn’t see how he was going to get all that information into two or three column-inches! And, well, turns out he didn’t have to: it’s a full page feature! There is also a big picture, my casual headshot, and can I just say how weird it is to see myself smiling out from the pages of a major magazine? Pretty weird!
I read the article outloud to EN as we rode the subway down to a wine shop in Tribeca, on a mission to get wine for the (FREE!) wine reception after the recital tomorrow. I had to stop about every other paragraph and look up at him dumbfoundedly (is that a word?). I am so impressed with Steve’s presentation of all the information, some of it very sensitive; his writing is thoughtful and kind, and it’s obvious that he’s been a reader of the concert for quite a while.
Thank you, Steve! I’m honored to have my first profile, in conjunction with my first recital in NY, written by you, and with such care.
I have an hour more here at home before I meet Jocelyn at the gallery for our dress rehearsal. It’s all falling into place! I’m not nervous, per se, but I do feel the need to step up to the plate even more now. Heck, all of New York might show up…
Friday, May 11, 2007
A day in the life
Today was one of those days, the kind of day that lets me know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I am “living the life,” that I am a professional singer. I’m still kind of floating from the sheer joy of it all! Let me see if I can summarize.
Morning spent, as it often is, with coffee and email and, today, finishing the flyer for the recital. This is just a half-sheet of paper with all the pertinent information about the recital: date (May 17), time (7:30), location (Gallerie Icosahedron, 27 N. Moore St), overview of the program (works by Harbison, Barber, Rachmaninoff, Cohen, Dylan, and a world premiere by Judd Greenstein), and a word about the Bhakti Project-sponsored wine (and cheesecake!) reception following the recital. The morning always goes by too quickly, and then it was time to rush off to meet with Jocelyn.
We spent the time working on Hillula, which is, to use Judd’s word, large-scale! It’s about 18-minutes long, and we’ve had it for about a week, with about another week to go. Needless to say, we went rapidly back and forth between feelings of great joy (it’s a gorgeous work) and great stress! We’ll find the middle ground, though, and make sure what we offer on Thursday is on par with the works we’ve been rehearsing for weeks. This is my New York recital debut, and we want to make sure it goes off without a hitch - not to mention giving Hillula the debut it deserves!
So, another step to that end: checking my Russian diction. I left NYU (where we’d been rehearsing) at 2:15, grabbed a burrito to go, and headed up on the 1 to meet DN at 114th. As soon as we sang through the first song, which I’d learned at Tanglewood in 2003, he said, “Did you coach this with Ken Griffiths?” Indeed I did! Turns out all the little diction things Ken grilled into me at Tanglewood are still there, and, as he studied with him, too, DN could recognize them! We sang through the other two songs, and I was given clearance to sing Russian in public. (What a great language!)
Then I had 45 minutes to get down to the Water Taxi at Pier 11, just off Wall Street, to head over for our meeting with Nadia. Her studio is in Red Hook, Brooklyn, which doesn’t have a subway stop very close by, so Jocelyn and I rendezvous-d (is that a word?) amid much confusion at the Pier. We got on the right boat (no running down the gangplank swearing this time, EHR!) and enjoyed a beautiful ride through across the river. It was a gorgeous day, and the breeze felt absolutely divine. I finally got to eat that burrito on the ride over, and then we were in Brooklyn.
If any of you have ever taken the Water Taxi over to the Brooklyn Army Terminal stop, I think you’ll agree with me when I say that it feels like another country! All of a sudden, we were in Italy or France! The old street car, the supermarket café on the water, and the beautiful old studios lining the street. Charming. We walked towards the studio, but couldn’t locate the address, so I called Nadia. When I told her where we were, she said that she was on the next block, and, still on the phone, I indicated to Jocelyn that we needed to walk “that way,” when Nadia said, “No, the other way.” She could see us! We turned around and found the building, but then couldn’t figure out how to get in. A big truck was in the driveway, getting worked on by several handsome young men, one of whom saw us poking around and said, “You must be looking for Nadia!” Brooklyn is charming and friendly!
We found our way upstairs and were soon drowning in luscious fabrics and colors and styles and ….!!! Nadia was so sweet and generous; she’ll be coming to the recital on Thursday, so if you want to meet the genius behind the dress, come on by. I ended up with two “every day” type dresses (pictures forth-coming) and a long blush-colored Signature Wrap dress for the recital; Jocelyn chose a deep red long gown and the shorter style in champagne. It felt like Christmas morning!! J summed it up perfectly as we were walking back to the water taxi: “I’ve never felt that way in a dress!” It is easily the most comfortable, sexiest dress we’ve ever worn. Get yourself one, or get one for the lady in your life. You won’t be sorry!
We had time before the taxi, so we got a snack at the lovely Fairway: fresh, precut mango; some manchego cheese; and a bar of Lindt classic dark chocolate. We sat across from each other as the taxi zoomed farther over to Brooklyn and then back to Manhattan, grinning at each other in amazement.
Jocelyn headed off to a concert, and I walked on farther to catch the A at Chambers Street. On the way, my manager called: more good news for next season! Talk about a cherry on the top of an already wonderful day. The weekend will be busy – and probably stressful – with studying and more recital prep, but the joy of this day will get us through.
Morning spent, as it often is, with coffee and email and, today, finishing the flyer for the recital. This is just a half-sheet of paper with all the pertinent information about the recital: date (May 17), time (7:30), location (Gallerie Icosahedron, 27 N. Moore St), overview of the program (works by Harbison, Barber, Rachmaninoff, Cohen, Dylan, and a world premiere by Judd Greenstein), and a word about the Bhakti Project-sponsored wine (and cheesecake!) reception following the recital. The morning always goes by too quickly, and then it was time to rush off to meet with Jocelyn.
We spent the time working on Hillula, which is, to use Judd’s word, large-scale! It’s about 18-minutes long, and we’ve had it for about a week, with about another week to go. Needless to say, we went rapidly back and forth between feelings of great joy (it’s a gorgeous work) and great stress! We’ll find the middle ground, though, and make sure what we offer on Thursday is on par with the works we’ve been rehearsing for weeks. This is my New York recital debut, and we want to make sure it goes off without a hitch - not to mention giving Hillula the debut it deserves!
So, another step to that end: checking my Russian diction. I left NYU (where we’d been rehearsing) at 2:15, grabbed a burrito to go, and headed up on the 1 to meet DN at 114th. As soon as we sang through the first song, which I’d learned at Tanglewood in 2003, he said, “Did you coach this with Ken Griffiths?” Indeed I did! Turns out all the little diction things Ken grilled into me at Tanglewood are still there, and, as he studied with him, too, DN could recognize them! We sang through the other two songs, and I was given clearance to sing Russian in public. (What a great language!)
Then I had 45 minutes to get down to the Water Taxi at Pier 11, just off Wall Street, to head over for our meeting with Nadia. Her studio is in Red Hook, Brooklyn, which doesn’t have a subway stop very close by, so Jocelyn and I rendezvous-d (is that a word?) amid much confusion at the Pier. We got on the right boat (no running down the gangplank swearing this time, EHR!) and enjoyed a beautiful ride through across the river. It was a gorgeous day, and the breeze felt absolutely divine. I finally got to eat that burrito on the ride over, and then we were in Brooklyn.
If any of you have ever taken the Water Taxi over to the Brooklyn Army Terminal stop, I think you’ll agree with me when I say that it feels like another country! All of a sudden, we were in Italy or France! The old street car, the supermarket café on the water, and the beautiful old studios lining the street. Charming. We walked towards the studio, but couldn’t locate the address, so I called Nadia. When I told her where we were, she said that she was on the next block, and, still on the phone, I indicated to Jocelyn that we needed to walk “that way,” when Nadia said, “No, the other way.” She could see us! We turned around and found the building, but then couldn’t figure out how to get in. A big truck was in the driveway, getting worked on by several handsome young men, one of whom saw us poking around and said, “You must be looking for Nadia!” Brooklyn is charming and friendly!
We found our way upstairs and were soon drowning in luscious fabrics and colors and styles and ….!!! Nadia was so sweet and generous; she’ll be coming to the recital on Thursday, so if you want to meet the genius behind the dress, come on by. I ended up with two “every day” type dresses (pictures forth-coming) and a long blush-colored Signature Wrap dress for the recital; Jocelyn chose a deep red long gown and the shorter style in champagne. It felt like Christmas morning!! J summed it up perfectly as we were walking back to the water taxi: “I’ve never felt that way in a dress!” It is easily the most comfortable, sexiest dress we’ve ever worn. Get yourself one, or get one for the lady in your life. You won’t be sorry!
We had time before the taxi, so we got a snack at the lovely Fairway: fresh, precut mango; some manchego cheese; and a bar of Lindt classic dark chocolate. We sat across from each other as the taxi zoomed farther over to Brooklyn and then back to Manhattan, grinning at each other in amazement.
Jocelyn headed off to a concert, and I walked on farther to catch the A at Chambers Street. On the way, my manager called: more good news for next season! Talk about a cherry on the top of an already wonderful day. The weekend will be busy – and probably stressful – with studying and more recital prep, but the joy of this day will get us through.
Tuesday, April 24, 2007
Met Debut Weekend: Leading Up
(Part 1 of 3... so far!)
My little hobbit-hole is too stuffy to sit in on a day like this, so I’ve come down to the Naked City Café, where they have Die Zauberflöte playing over the speakers. (Aha: it’s not just the opera – it’s Met Radio on Sirius! A nice synchronicity!)
Ok, let’s go all the way back… The days leading up to Friday night were rather tumultuous, Wednesday being a really rough day and Thursday being a beautiful one. So, I was already a bit stirred up before Friday night; in fact, I had lunch with a friend Friday afternoon, and he said, “I can see your head spinning.” Yep, that was about it!
We’ll leave Wednesday for now, and get to the good stuff on Thursday:
* a wonderfully grounding and joyful brunch with JD and LB, my girls – we all had things to celebrate
* a text from MP asking if I’d like to be interviewed on Sirius Met Radio at second intermission on Friday - along with LW, my fellow debutante – about our debut… um, YES!
* my first visit to “the other Met” and a new friend (and by the time we walked out of the museum spring had arrived in NYC!)
* shopping for opening night cards at an art store filled with too many beautiful things
* requests from two publications (one in NY; one in Portland, OR) for interviews, each on a different facet of my career
* and then, when the day couldn’t really get any better, a voice message: “ACB, it’s your manager. I have an offer for you… call me!”
Offers are always good news, of course, and when I learned what it was, I let out a “YES!” right there on the corner of 57th & 7th. Haven’t signed the contract yet, so I can’t say when and where, but it’s something in Italian – finally! – and is one of the first roles I fell in love with but wasn’t sure I’d ever get a chance to do. It’s a big role (one of the biggest for soprano) at a nice-sized house – not too big, not too small; great place to try it on for what will hopefully be the first time. Very exciting news to get the day before another big debut!
I can’t remember what I did for dinner on Thursday, but I know that I met a friend for a nightcap, which probably helped me fall asleep quickly and sleep peacefully. I woke up, and it was Friday!
My little hobbit-hole is too stuffy to sit in on a day like this, so I’ve come down to the Naked City Café, where they have Die Zauberflöte playing over the speakers. (Aha: it’s not just the opera – it’s Met Radio on Sirius! A nice synchronicity!)
Ok, let’s go all the way back… The days leading up to Friday night were rather tumultuous, Wednesday being a really rough day and Thursday being a beautiful one. So, I was already a bit stirred up before Friday night; in fact, I had lunch with a friend Friday afternoon, and he said, “I can see your head spinning.” Yep, that was about it!
We’ll leave Wednesday for now, and get to the good stuff on Thursday:
* a wonderfully grounding and joyful brunch with JD and LB, my girls – we all had things to celebrate
* a text from MP asking if I’d like to be interviewed on Sirius Met Radio at second intermission on Friday - along with LW, my fellow debutante – about our debut… um, YES!
* my first visit to “the other Met” and a new friend (and by the time we walked out of the museum spring had arrived in NYC!)
* shopping for opening night cards at an art store filled with too many beautiful things
* requests from two publications (one in NY; one in Portland, OR) for interviews, each on a different facet of my career
* and then, when the day couldn’t really get any better, a voice message: “ACB, it’s your manager. I have an offer for you… call me!”
Offers are always good news, of course, and when I learned what it was, I let out a “YES!” right there on the corner of 57th & 7th. Haven’t signed the contract yet, so I can’t say when and where, but it’s something in Italian – finally! – and is one of the first roles I fell in love with but wasn’t sure I’d ever get a chance to do. It’s a big role (one of the biggest for soprano) at a nice-sized house – not too big, not too small; great place to try it on for what will hopefully be the first time. Very exciting news to get the day before another big debut!
I can’t remember what I did for dinner on Thursday, but I know that I met a friend for a nightcap, which probably helped me fall asleep quickly and sleep peacefully. I woke up, and it was Friday!
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
New photos
Oh, and one more thing I did this weekend: added some new Production photos to the Photos page on my website. Four new shots from Black Box Opera Theater's double bill of Degenerate Cabaret and The Emperor of Atlantis. I've got some new sound clips to get up there, too, but I haven't quite figured out how to do that. Stay tuned...
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
Summer
While I’m waiting to hear if I can go out to have drinks for my birthday or if I need to stay home and rest for the George London Finals tomorrow, I thought I’d distract myself by finally writing about the summer. Through a most unorthodox – but not really that unusual – turn of events, I will be a Filene Young Artist at Wolf Trap!
As I made pretty clear a few weeks ago, I didn’t audition for Wolf Trap this year. But I sang a good audition for them in 2005 (Kim Witman is the voice behind the table in the first anecdote in my “Average Audition” post), and KPW and I have kept in touch over the past couple of years. When she learned that my summer plans had fallen through, she let me know of their own unusual situation.
After they’d made invitations for the summer, WTOC had several returning singers, including a soprano, withdraw from their contracts, each for their own good reasons. The handful of other sopranos that they had on their shortlist after the auditions in December had all been informed that they weren’t in the final group, released from their “holds,” and they went on to accept other summer gigs. So Kim and her crew went back to the drawing board, so to speak, informing some initially rejected singers that they might be considered again – and inviting me to come down to Vienna and audition. I took a day trip to DC, sang four arias (the most I’ve sung in any audition), and was later offered the spot!
A friend of mine said, when the first gig fell through, “There must be something better out there for you this summer.” I agreed, of course, because you always agree when someone says that when trying to cheer you up, but inside I was thinking, “What can there be, this late in the game?” And here it is, quite possibly the perfect summer scenario for me at this stage of my career. I still don’t quite understand how it came to me, or why, but I’m going to take the opportunity and run with it. It’s unexpected, and unusual, but here it is.
I have heard so many wonderful things about Wolf Trap – the attitude of support and collegiality that is fostered there, the level of artistry of the singers and staff, the beauty of the surrounding area – and it is seen as the height of “young artist programs.” People look at WTOC and say “Who’s singing there this year?” It’s like a barometer of the up-and-coming singers. Does that make sense? As Kim says in her post today, “an entire generation of singers began their careers” at Wolf Trap. She lists Nathan Gunn, Dawn Upshaw, Mary Dunleavy, and Eric Owens, and the rest of the list of alumni is thrilling. And now, since a professional gig I’d pinned my hopes on didn’t pan out, I get the chance to join them. What a ride.
While I’ve been typing this, I’ve learned that calls went out for the finals, and I didn’t make the cut. Oh, well. Win some, lose some, as this post now fully relates!
Now I have no reason not to stay up until 2am watching Season Two of Grey’s Anatomy…
As I made pretty clear a few weeks ago, I didn’t audition for Wolf Trap this year. But I sang a good audition for them in 2005 (Kim Witman is the voice behind the table in the first anecdote in my “Average Audition” post), and KPW and I have kept in touch over the past couple of years. When she learned that my summer plans had fallen through, she let me know of their own unusual situation.
After they’d made invitations for the summer, WTOC had several returning singers, including a soprano, withdraw from their contracts, each for their own good reasons. The handful of other sopranos that they had on their shortlist after the auditions in December had all been informed that they weren’t in the final group, released from their “holds,” and they went on to accept other summer gigs. So Kim and her crew went back to the drawing board, so to speak, informing some initially rejected singers that they might be considered again – and inviting me to come down to Vienna and audition. I took a day trip to DC, sang four arias (the most I’ve sung in any audition), and was later offered the spot!
A friend of mine said, when the first gig fell through, “There must be something better out there for you this summer.” I agreed, of course, because you always agree when someone says that when trying to cheer you up, but inside I was thinking, “What can there be, this late in the game?” And here it is, quite possibly the perfect summer scenario for me at this stage of my career. I still don’t quite understand how it came to me, or why, but I’m going to take the opportunity and run with it. It’s unexpected, and unusual, but here it is.
I have heard so many wonderful things about Wolf Trap – the attitude of support and collegiality that is fostered there, the level of artistry of the singers and staff, the beauty of the surrounding area – and it is seen as the height of “young artist programs.” People look at WTOC and say “Who’s singing there this year?” It’s like a barometer of the up-and-coming singers. Does that make sense? As Kim says in her post today, “an entire generation of singers began their careers” at Wolf Trap. She lists Nathan Gunn, Dawn Upshaw, Mary Dunleavy, and Eric Owens, and the rest of the list of alumni is thrilling. And now, since a professional gig I’d pinned my hopes on didn’t pan out, I get the chance to join them. What a ride.
While I’ve been typing this, I’ve learned that calls went out for the finals, and I didn’t make the cut. Oh, well. Win some, lose some, as this post now fully relates!
Now I have no reason not to stay up until 2am watching Season Two of Grey’s Anatomy…
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Overzealous
Note to self: Don’t come home and dive into an intense hour of singing after eating a huge brunch, no matter how inspired you might be after reading this month’s Opera News. Just don’t.
I have the worse case of heartburn I’ve had in months. Ouch!!
What was so inspiring? Here are some quotes:
Emily Pulley on rhetoric: “Professor Como said that the basis of good rhetoric – you know, the kind we never hear anymore – is to be a reliable source, speak the truth and love your audience. And something in my mind clicked. That’s the kind of singer I want to be.”
Diana Damrau on Aithra: “I’m looking forward not only to sing this but to play this role!” Opera can also be about the words!!
From a review of LHL’s Neruda Songs: “[Regardless of] the music on offer…, the mezzo could create for her listeners the illusion of complete spontaneity; she made every word and every not her own, performing with the commitment and pride of an artist who was delivering a piece that had been written just for her.”
Also, I’m sure I’m not the only singer who “does the math” about other singer’s ages when reading biographical articles. We all wonder how we’re doing, whether we’re on a track to achieve the same level of success by the same age. Of course, we know that each track is different, everyone gets to their peak at a different time, blah blah blah, but we can’t help but compare. I was inspired by doing the math on Emily Pulley, who reveals that she will turn 40 this year; she made her Met debut in a small role in 1993 (she was also a Met Competition winner that year), so at age 26. In the last 14 years, she has slowly worked her way from that small role to a full plate of roles at top houses and a reputation for success in American opera. We younger singers very easily forget that success isn’t handed to us right out of grad school, or right after a summer at a top YAP, or even after signing our first Met contract. It’s a long time coming. We work now to achieve later, if that makes any sense.
After all this, plus a few pages of Song of the Lark, I was ready to come home and get down to business! But my poor overstuffed belly didn’t appreciate getting pushed around by my overzealous diaphragm and abs, and now I have heartburn. So it’s armchair work for the rest of the night: L’elisir translations and diction work. Also very important steps towards achieving that success, but not quite as viscerally fulfilling as singing scales and arpeggios…
I have the worse case of heartburn I’ve had in months. Ouch!!
What was so inspiring? Here are some quotes:
Emily Pulley on rhetoric: “Professor Como said that the basis of good rhetoric – you know, the kind we never hear anymore – is to be a reliable source, speak the truth and love your audience. And something in my mind clicked. That’s the kind of singer I want to be.”
Diana Damrau on Aithra: “I’m looking forward not only to sing this but to play this role!” Opera can also be about the words!!
From a review of LHL’s Neruda Songs: “[Regardless of] the music on offer…, the mezzo could create for her listeners the illusion of complete spontaneity; she made every word and every not her own, performing with the commitment and pride of an artist who was delivering a piece that had been written just for her.”
Also, I’m sure I’m not the only singer who “does the math” about other singer’s ages when reading biographical articles. We all wonder how we’re doing, whether we’re on a track to achieve the same level of success by the same age. Of course, we know that each track is different, everyone gets to their peak at a different time, blah blah blah, but we can’t help but compare. I was inspired by doing the math on Emily Pulley, who reveals that she will turn 40 this year; she made her Met debut in a small role in 1993 (she was also a Met Competition winner that year), so at age 26. In the last 14 years, she has slowly worked her way from that small role to a full plate of roles at top houses and a reputation for success in American opera. We younger singers very easily forget that success isn’t handed to us right out of grad school, or right after a summer at a top YAP, or even after signing our first Met contract. It’s a long time coming. We work now to achieve later, if that makes any sense.
After all this, plus a few pages of Song of the Lark, I was ready to come home and get down to business! But my poor overstuffed belly didn’t appreciate getting pushed around by my overzealous diaphragm and abs, and now I have heartburn. So it’s armchair work for the rest of the night: L’elisir translations and diction work. Also very important steps towards achieving that success, but not quite as viscerally fulfilling as singing scales and arpeggios…
Friday, February 02, 2007
This week
Sorry to be quiet all week, it’s been kind of crazy around here. To make it up to you, here are some bullet points!
• I have summer employment! More on that exciting opportunity and it’s unorthodox development later… once I sign something.
• Opening Night was wonderful. I sat in the artists’ cafeteria trying to get more translations written into my Elixir score. I think I maybe got ten pages done! That’s something, right? KW and I “held court” at a table and chit-chatted our way through the evening, entertaining other singers and friends as they came through the café throughout the evening. We learned all too late of the opening night reception, for which neither of us was attired, so after our characters’ last words were sung in Act III, we headed home. But rest assured that opening night of Helena will have us both dressed to the nines and ready to drink champagne on the Grand Tier!
• There are three radio broadcasts of Jenufa, so I’ll be in house for those performances (likely in the café with KW again). Tonight I’m attending the performance, actually sitting in the auditorium (with a date, who is nervous about being left all alone, should I suddenly be called to the stage!).
• I’ll also be in the house for the performance on the 10th, since Judith Forst will be singing Kostenlicka that night. You may recall that she was my mother in Cendrillon last summer, and let me assure you: she is every bit as gripping and terrifying as Kostenlicka as she was hysterical as the Stepmother! Watching her in our cover staging rehearsal was a lesson in commitment and dramatic focus. KW and I will be sitting in the company box for that performance, gripping each other’s arms until the blood flow to our hands is cut off.
• I had my first coaching for Helena on Wednesday, and it was fine. Not great, but fine. I’m singing the middle line of three or four voices, and that’s really hard! KW admits that her line – the top – is “easy” since it’s always the melody. It’s Strauss, so it’s not easy by any means, but I’ll agree that it’s easier than mine! Once we start rehearsing with all of the voices, I think I’ll feel much more comfortable; trying to hear how my part fits in with just the piano reduction is tough. Hopefully we’ll start those music prep rehearsals this week or next.
• That’s all for now! Time to get dressed, but what to wear when you want to look nice and it’s wintry-mixing outside? No easy answer…
• I have summer employment! More on that exciting opportunity and it’s unorthodox development later… once I sign something.
• Opening Night was wonderful. I sat in the artists’ cafeteria trying to get more translations written into my Elixir score. I think I maybe got ten pages done! That’s something, right? KW and I “held court” at a table and chit-chatted our way through the evening, entertaining other singers and friends as they came through the café throughout the evening. We learned all too late of the opening night reception, for which neither of us was attired, so after our characters’ last words were sung in Act III, we headed home. But rest assured that opening night of Helena will have us both dressed to the nines and ready to drink champagne on the Grand Tier!
• There are three radio broadcasts of Jenufa, so I’ll be in house for those performances (likely in the café with KW again). Tonight I’m attending the performance, actually sitting in the auditorium (with a date, who is nervous about being left all alone, should I suddenly be called to the stage!).
• I’ll also be in the house for the performance on the 10th, since Judith Forst will be singing Kostenlicka that night. You may recall that she was my mother in Cendrillon last summer, and let me assure you: she is every bit as gripping and terrifying as Kostenlicka as she was hysterical as the Stepmother! Watching her in our cover staging rehearsal was a lesson in commitment and dramatic focus. KW and I will be sitting in the company box for that performance, gripping each other’s arms until the blood flow to our hands is cut off.
• I had my first coaching for Helena on Wednesday, and it was fine. Not great, but fine. I’m singing the middle line of three or four voices, and that’s really hard! KW admits that her line – the top – is “easy” since it’s always the melody. It’s Strauss, so it’s not easy by any means, but I’ll agree that it’s easier than mine! Once we start rehearsing with all of the voices, I think I’ll feel much more comfortable; trying to hear how my part fits in with just the piano reduction is tough. Hopefully we’ll start those music prep rehearsals this week or next.
• That’s all for now! Time to get dressed, but what to wear when you want to look nice and it’s wintry-mixing outside? No easy answer…
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